Lost, Three Tanka

Despair rips across
Thoughts and vivid dreams of life,
Opening the mind
To visions of hopelessness
And paths that lead into fog.

Lost in grey water
That floats silent through the streets
Touching broken hearts,
Breathing life into dark thoughts,
And a future of white pain.

Pale is the autumn
At the dawn of October,
Atop rain-soaked streets
Full with the wandering lost,
All they see is a warm home.

Persimmon Tree

A Persimmon tree,
Heavy with fruit, nearly ripe.
Sweet expectation.


I don’t feel like a man
I don’t feel like a person
I don’t feel like a human
I don’t feel like I belong
I don’t feel worthy

I feel worthless


The brain burns
With pulsating currents
Of neurological electricity
And emotional instability.

The brain burns
And awareness stays,
I can feel the shaking
I live in the fire.

The brain burns
With magic,
White lights dance
Until the afterglow.

The brain burns,
Reality bends,
Visual metamorphosis
It never really ends.


We look at ourselves and wonder.
We look to the outside and see only reflections.
What are we?
We are beings behind the masks we make.
We are beings beyond what lies beneath.


A gentle touch brings
A budding flower to bloom.
A finger’s soft glide,
She moans in the morning haze.

Her soul fills with ecstasy.


I awoke to find self loathing,
A spark of death in my heart.

I awoke to swimming despair,
A drop heartache in an ocean.

I awoke to the light fading,
And the hurt expanding by leagues.

I awoke to a new emptiness,
That’s as old as my age of existence.

I awoke to the pains I’ve caused
To an undeserving heart.

I awoke to a moonless night
The stars no longer speak.

Bleeding (Censored)

I’m falling,

Falling from the mountains of emotion,

Falling from the epic climb up cliffs and peaks.

I can smell piss,

It permeates the house and carpet,

It lives in the furniture, I clean and the next week returns.

I’m lonely,

Living day to day with minimal adult interaction,

Living in a house but unable to make it a home.

I crave,

Longing for the inebriation and sweet forgetfulness of spirits,

Longing for times when the weight is still there, but considerably less.

I’m tired,

Sleep comes in short bursts and then poor in quality,

Sleep brings good dreams, the only reprieve.

I cry,

Tears in the early morning, before the sun rises,

Tears of self pity, emptiness, and loss.

I’m nauseated,

Puke is always at the point of expulsion,

Puke is always fought back down, no time for that.

I’m sad,

Saddened by the mental incapacity of the father,

Saddened by the hurt I’ve caused the ones I love.

I exist,

Only by the will and strength of diapers both young and old,

Only for the love given and the smiles of my children.

I live.

A Game


A dim light shines through,

Illuminating her curves

On burgundy sheets.


Nude upon the Egyptian cotton, her breasts exposed. The air moves gently across her nipples and along her dew dropped curves. She shivers at the sensation. She knows she’s watching.


Life, you twisted thing,

New adventures in the night,

Under watchful eyes.


She stands by the bed watching her nakedness in motion. Her hand move across the body’s contours, stopping at the mounds of flesh topped by light brown nipples, circling, playing with the silken skin, then moving down to the deep places where she blooms in damp delight.


On a bed she’s watched,

Woman looking on woman,

Game of desire.


She’s watching her perform. She stands, she quivers. Her eyes follow her hands. Her hands follow her eyes. The watcher is being watched and in time her hands move down to bring herself in tune with the laying beauty.


She stands by the bed,

Nude in the soft yellow light.

Above watchful eyes.


They gaze. They touch without touching. They love. They make love through thought and inaction. When their minds meet, a climax of infinite lust erupts into a fluidic waking dream. Infinite desire, infinite lust. Beautiful tension.


And then, with a kiss

Begins a bodies bonding.

And then, with a touch . . .


A Quiet Moment

Serenity lost,
Emotional tsunami,
A quiet moment.


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